$text
(if: $touch < 3)[
(if: $ask1 is 0)[(link: "Ask what the object is")[(set: $text to "MC Hammer goes on: 'We don't really know what the Standard of Ur was used for, but it is definitely linked to the king because it was found in a royal grave. It shows scenes of enemy soldiers being presented to the king, and a ceremonial banquet.'")(set: $ask1 to 1)(goto: 'Object1')]]
(if: $ask2 is 0)[(link: "Ask about the object's context")[(set: $text to "He continues 'The standard is from Ur - one of the earliest known cities. The city of Ur was in Mesopotamia, which means *land between the rivers*. Each city, like Ur, was a self-contained centre of power, ruled by a king and containing palaces and more!'")(set: $ask2 to 1)(goto: 'Object1')]]
(if: $ask3 is 0)[(link: "Ask if you can touch this")[(set: $text to "MC Hammer sighs. 'You can't touch this'")(set: $ask3 to 1)(set: $touch to it+1)(goto: 'Object1')]]
[[Move to the next gallery->Object2Prep]]
]
(if: $touch is 3)[ (goto: 'BadEnd')](set: $ask1 to 0)(set: $ask2 to 0)(set: $ask3 to 0)**The Assyrian Gallery**
(set: $text to "MC Hammer points out an object: 'In this gallery, I like the Lachish Reliefs. They are stone carvings, showing an army attacking a town, from King Sennacherib of Assyria's palace.'")
<img src="http://stevebromley.com/games/museum/images/assyria.jpg" width="80%" alt="Assyria">
[[Enter the Assyrian Gallery->Object2]]$text
(if: $touch < 3)[
(if: $ask1 is 0)[(link: "Ask what the object is")[(set: $text to "MC Hammer describes...'The Lachish relief shows a siege by the Assyrian army in 701 BC to the town of Lachish. Prisoners are being marched out, while soldier's climb the town walls. The relief was made for the palace of the Assyrian king, and show the consequences of rebelling against his empire.'")(set: $ask1 to 1)(goto: 'Object2')]]
(if: $ask2 is 0)[(link: "Ask about the object's context")[(set: $text to "MC Hammer explains 'The Assyrians were well known for their military successes, but they initially developed a strong army as a defensive measure. The center of their empire had no natural defensives, and were vulnerable to attack. Consequering Lachish was just one of the cities they took when building an empire that stretched from Egypt to Iran'.")(set: $ask2 to 1)(goto: 'Object2')]]
(if: $ask3 is 0)[(link: "Ask if you can touch this")[(set: $text to "A stern look. 'Hey, if you're not going to take this seriously, I won't be happy...
but yes, you also cannot touch this.'")(set: $ask3 to 1)(set: $touch to it+1)(goto: 'Object2')]]
[[Move to the next gallery->Object3Prep]]
]
(if: $touch is 3)[ (goto: 'BadEnd')](set: $ask1 to 0)(set: $ask2 to 0)(set: $ask3 to 0)**The Roman Gallery**
(set: $text to "MC Hammer rushes towards an object: 'I wanted to show you the Warren Cup. It's a silver cup used at Roman dinner parties decorated with pairs of male lovers'")
<img src="http://stevebromley.com/games/museum/images/rome.jpg" width="80%" alt="Rome">
[[Enter the Roman Gallery->Object3]]$text
(if: $touch < 3)[
(if: $ask1 is 0)[(link: "Ask what the object is")[(set: $text to "MC Hammer describes 'The Warren Cup was a luxurious silver cup, probably used at dinner parties. One one half there is a picture showing two teenage boys making love. The other half shows a young man lowering himself onto the lap of his elder, bearded lover while a slave-boy peers in voyeuristically from behind a door. Really interesting to see how cultural norms change over time'")(set: $ask1 to 1)(goto: 'Object3')]]
(if: $ask2 is 0)[(link: "Ask about the object's context")[(set: $text to "He continues 'pictures like this were not unusual in the Roman world. Some of the boys on this cup are underage by today's standards, but the Romans tolerated relationships between older and younger men. Today such ancient images remind us that the way societies view sexuality is never fixed.'")(set: $ask2 to 1)(goto: 'Object3')]]
(if: $ask3 is 0)[(link: "Ask if you can touch this")[(set: $text to "'This isn't cool man. I'm trying to move on'")(set: $ask3 to 1)(set: $touch to it+1)(goto: 'Object3')]]
[[Move to the next gallery->Object4Prep]]
]
(if: $touch is 3)[ (goto: 'BadEnd')](set: $ask1 to 0)(set: $ask2 to 0)(set: $ask3 to 0)**The Central American Gallery**
(set: $text to "MC Hammer points out something near the back of the gallery: 'Look at this belt. It was used in ball games in Central America and Mexico.'")
<img src="http://stevebromley.com/games/museum/images/americas.jpg" width="80%" alt="Americas">
[[Enter the Central American Gallery->Object4]]$text
(if: $touch < 3)[
(if: $ask1 is 0)[(link: "Ask what the object is")[(set: $text to "MC Hammer goes on 'This is a stone version of the belt that people would wear for playing a popular ballgame in Mesoamerica. Because it's made of stone, it is too heavy to wear for playing, so is likely to have been used for ceremonies. The game itself was a bit like volleyball, but didn't have a net and used rubber balls. The players had to keep these balls in the air by hitting them with their belts.'")(set: $ask1 to 1)(goto: 'Object4')]]
(if: $ask2 is 0)[(link: "Ask about the object's context")[(set: $text to "MC Hammer continues 'The ball game was played in Mexico for three and a half thousand years. They built special ball courts, and the game was used to determine political and territorial disputes - sometimes ending in a sacrifice for the loser!'")(set: $ask2 to 1)(goto: 'Object4')]]
(if: $ask3 is 0)[(link: "Ask if you can touch this")[(set: $text to "'How original...'")(set: $ask3 to 1)(set: $touch to it+1)(goto: 'Object4')]]
[[Move to the next gallery->Object5Prep]]
]
(if: $touch is 3)[ (goto: 'BadEnd')](set: $ask1 to 0)(set: $ask2 to 0)(set: $ask3 to 0)**The European Gallery**
(set: $text to "MC Hammer takes your hand and leads you over to a cabinet: 'These are the Lewis Chessmen. They were found in Scotland, but the game of Chess originates from India.'")
<img src="http://stevebromley.com/games/museum/images/europe.jpg" width="80%" alt="Europe">
[[Enter the European Gallery->Object5]]$text
(if: $touch < 3)[
(if: $ask1 is 0)[(link: "Ask what the object is")[(set: $text to "MC Hammer describes the chess pieces: 'They were found on a beach in Scotland in 1831. You can see that they are carved from walrus ivory and whale tooth - it's thought that they were made between 1150 and 1200. They originally had red paint on them, indicating that the teams were red against white. As this island in Scotland used to be part of the kingdom of Norway, it's likely they came from Norway.'")(set: $ask1 to 1)(goto: 'Object5')]]
(if: $ask2 is 0)[(link: "Ask about the object's context")[(set: $text to "MC Hammer goes on: 'Chess came from India around 500 BC and came to Europe via the Islamic world by at least the AD 990s. The original Indian and Islamic game was adapted to reflect medieval European society, so that the Indian war elephant was replaced with the figure of the bishop. The rooks biting their shields resemble the Viking berserkers of Norse myth, while the pose of the queens is derived from depictions of the grieving Virgin Mary. The pawns, lacking any human features, reflect the abstract pieces used in the Islamic version of the game.'")(set: $ask2 to 1)(goto: 'Object5')]]
(if: $ask3 is 0)[(link: "Ask if you can touch this")[(set: $text to "'Actually, yes, this one you can touch...
Of course not! This isn't the science museum!'")(set: $ask3 to 1)(set: $touch to it+1)(goto: 'Object5')]]
[[Move to the next gallery->Object6Prep]]
]
(if: $touch is 3)[ (goto: 'BadEnd')](set: $ask1 to 0)(set: $ask2 to 0)(set: $ask3 to 0)**The African Gallery**
(set: $text to "'Ah, this is the last gallery on our tour - what a shame. But also, what an object! This is the Throne of Weapons. It was made by an artist from Mozambique who crafted a throne from European weapons used in and collected after the civil war.'")
<img src="http://stevebromley.com/games/museum/images/africa.jpg" width="80%" alt="Africa">
[[Enter the African Gallery->Object6]]$text
(if: $touch < 3)[
(if: $ask1 is 0)[(link: "Ask what the object is")[(set: $text to "MC Hammer describes: 'This sculpture is made out of decommissioned weapons from the Mozambique civil war, which ran from 1977 to 1992. During the Civil War, over 1 million people were killed, and 5 million people displaced. The throne represents both the tragedy of that war, and the triumph of peace since'.")(set: $ask1 to 1)(goto: 'Object6')]]
(if: $ask2 is 0)[(link: "Ask about the object's context")[(set: $text to "'In 1975 Mozambique declared itself a Marxist-Leninist state after achieving independence from Portuguese colonial rule. The new government's pro-communist and anti-apartheid stance threatened the regimes in neighbouring. South Africa and Rhodesia. Those countries funded an opposition group in an attempt to destabilize the country. In turn the Soviet Union gave Mozambique economic and military aid. The civil war finally came to an end after the collapse of the Soviet Union and the end of the apartheid regimes.'")(set: $ask2 to 1)(goto: 'Object6')]]
(if: $ask3 is 0)[(link: "Ask if you can touch this")[(set: $text to "'You've ruined this for both of us.'")(set: $ask3 to 1)(set: $touch to it+1)(goto: 'Object6')]]
[[End the tour->NiceEnd]]
]
(if: $touch is 3)[ (goto: 'BadEnd')]You've arrived back at the entrance of the British Museum.
"Well, thanks all I had to show you today" says MC Hammer.
"I hope you've enjoyed the tour. All of the objects we've seen are from the British Museum's 100 Objects collection, which had an accompanying book and podcast by Neil McGregor, so there's a lot of information out there if you want to learn more - just google it!".
You wave goodbye to Hammer. It's been a good day.
The end.
(colour: "#D3D3D3")[`@steve_bromley`]
<span style="font-size: 150%">Celebrity Museum Tour!</span>
<span style="font-size: 80%">
(live:1s)[100% Celebrity (stop:)]
(live:2s)[100% Museums(stop:)]
(live:3s)[100% Tour (stop:)]
</span>
[[Enter the celebrity tour guide competition->Select a tour guide]]
(set: $celeblist to (a:
"Simon Schama",
"Lucy Worsley",
"Stephen Fry",
"Mary Beard",
"Jeremy Corbyn",
"Richard Osman",
"Tony Robinson",
"Keanu Reeves",
"Brian May",
"MC Hammer"
))
(set: $celeblistpre to (a:
"MC Hammer",
"Simon Schama",
"Lucy Worsley",
"Stephen Fry",
"Mary Beard",
"Jeremy Corbyn",
"Richard Osman",
"Tony Robinson",
"Keanu Reeves",
"Brian May"
))
(set: $celeblistpost to (a:
"Lucy Worsley",
"Stephen Fry",
"Mary Beard",
"Jeremy Corbyn",
"Richard Osman",
"Tony Robinson",
"Keanu Reeves",
"Brian May",
"MC Hammer",
"Simon Schama"
))
(set: $helloTimer to 0)Congratulations on winning a private tour of the **British Museum**. Now to find your celebrity guide...(live:0.1s)[
(set: $helloTimer to $helloTimer + 1)
(if: $helloTimer is 10)[(set: $helloTimer to 0)]
(print: $celeblistpre[$helloTimer])
**(print: $celeblist[$helloTimer])**
(print: $celeblistpost[$helloTimer])
]
(link: "Find your host")[(set: $helloTimer to 0)(goto: 'Stop')]
Your host will be...
(live:0.4s)[
(set: $helloTimer to $helloTimer + 1)
(if: $helloTimer is 9)[(stop:)(goto:'Stop2')(set: $helloTimer to $helloTimer + 1)]
(print: $celeblistpre[$helloTimer])
**(print: $celeblist[$helloTimer])**
(print: $celeblistpost[$helloTimer])
]Your host will be...
(print: $celeblistpre[$helloTimer])
**(print: $celeblist[$helloTimer])**
(print: $celeblistpost[$helloTimer])
(live:2s)[Your celebrity tour host will be MC Hammer. (stop:)](live:5s)[Congratulations! (stop:)]
(live:9s)[ [[Start The Tour]] (stop:)](set: $ask1 to 0)(set: $ask2 to 0)(set: $ask3 to 0)(set: $touch to 0)**The Middle Eastern Gallery**
(set: $text to "MC Hammer starts to explain: 'The first object we will look at is the Standard of Ur. Ur was one of the first cities in the world. The standard shows some things the king of Ur did, in Ancient Iraq.'")
<img src="http://stevebromley.com/games/museum/images/middleeast.jpg" width="80%" alt="Middle East">
[[Enter the Middle Eastern Gallery->Object1]]"That's it, I'm out of here. Hammer time is over"
MC Hammer storms out.
You leave the museum, and feel bad about what you've done.
Was it worth it?
The end.
(colour: "#D3D3D3")[`@steve_bromley`]